Forming a strong connection with those you lead is crucial if you are to have success in your efforts. The stronger the bond, the more likely those you lead will want to help you achieve your goals and objectives. Here are some useful reminders that will help you form those strong connections with others.

1. Know yourself. To connect with others, you must first connect with yourself. Understand who you are and have confidence in yourself to communicate with others. Be willing to be a little vulnerable. It’ll demonstrate you’re human.
2. Be open and sincere. Don’t fake it. If you are giving information, be sincere. People will see through insincerity. Humans are better lie detectors than you give them credit for.
3. Know your audience. Invest the time and energy to learn people’s names. Be interested in their histories. Ask questions to discover their dreams. Once you understand them, you’ll be able to speak to what they care about.
4. Practice what you preach. Are...

Your vision of the future is the guiding light for your company. To attain that vision, every leader must communicate clearly and effectively the future they see. To make a powerful impact on your organization, you will need to ensure you have shared your message clearly. The next time you’re preparing to share your vision, use these questions to help you develop the message you want to send.

1. Does this message have clarity? Your communication should include what the people must know and what you want them to know. This information brings understanding to your vision message. Who, what, when, where, why, and how should be answered as much as possible in your message.
2. Does this message provide the context for this vision? Have I connected the past with the present, and together, does that paint the future in a way that is simple to understand? Have I connected the dots from the past to the present and show how that leads to the future? When in doubt, spend more time explaining...

Human communication is a complicated process with many moving parts. It’s easy to get it wrong or not as precise as intended. Good communicators understand their message goes beyond merely the words they use. They know how to say things. They know when to say things. They know how to use analogies and other tools to share understanding. They recognize the importance of inspiring others to act. Good communicators realize they share their opinion of the relationship with those they are communicating with. Base your communication upon your audience, not yourself.

Communication is a complicated give and takes process. Sometimes it’s a two-way street. Other times, it’s a one-way street. As a communicator, you only have control of what and how you project your message. The other variable in the equation you have no power over is the way the recipient receives your information. The audience hears not only what is said, but what you do not say. They pick up on the more...

The other day, I sent out a request to an individual to connect with them on LinkedIn. I included a brief note of how we met at a conference. Their reply to my invite was

David, just say this. Sorry.

At first, I didn’t know what to think. To me, not much time had passed between my invite and their acceptance. Their response puzzled me because they did accept the connection response. I couldn’t figure out what they meant by that statement. Was I supposed to say "sorry"? I admit I confused, and realized I was missing something, so I asked my wife for her opinion.

“Perhaps they meant to say “Just saw this. Sorry.”, she suggested. “Sometimes Siri doesn’t get it right, and people don’t check it before they hit send.”

That made sense to me. It can be difficult to practice what I preach at times. I teach that in leadership and negotiations, we shouldn’t hold on to our assumptions. If we don’t understand something or...

Recently, I discussed how you could identify and overcome your assumptions. I shared a story about talking with a friend some issues in our business. Early in the conversation, I could tell my friend came to argue his point. His body language shouted. I'm ready for a debate and argue my point. He was a little bit sterner in his facial expressions; his body language was defensive. I recognized I needed to get him to lower his defenses. So how did I get him to do that? I asked good open-ended questions. I inquired about his thoughts and feelings on the topic. I also let him know he did not have to answer my questions too. If he didn’t want to respond to any or just one of my questions, that would be okay. I wasn’t going to angry. You'll find most people will talk, especially if you invite them to. As they began to talk, they will share more information you can use to help gain a greater understanding of their positions and feelings.

Questions Are the Key to Understanding

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